Okay so I’m about to tell you about the most embarrassing fashion moment I’ve had in recent memory, which is saying something because my entire job revolves around looking put-together for content. Last month I was at this boutique sample sale in Austin – you know the type, everything’s crammed together and you’re basically wrestling other people for the good stuff – and I found this perfect silk cami. Like, the exact shade of blush pink that photographs beautifully and would work for literally every type of content I create.
I grabbed it and headed to the communal fitting room, which was already giving me anxiety because there’s nothing worse than trying on clothes in front of strangers when you’re having body image issues. But whatever, I needed this top for an upcoming brand collaboration and the price was too good to pass up.
The cami was a complete disaster on me. I’m talking gaps everywhere, weird pulling across my chest, the whole thing just sitting wrong no matter how I adjusted it. I was getting increasingly frustrated because this should have been simple – it was my size, it looked perfect on the hanger, but on my body it looked like I’d borrowed someone else’s clothes.
I was about to give up and dramatically yank it off when this woman next to me – who I vaguely recognised from some Austin fashion events – was like “it’s probably not the top, it’s your bra.” She said it so matter-of-factly that I immediately got defensive because hello, I literally create fashion content for a living. I know about bras.
“I’m wearing the right size,” I said, which was technically true if you count getting sized at Victoria’s Secret three years ago as gospel. She just looked at me with this knowing expression and was like “for that specific neckline? I doubt it.”
This stopped me dead because… what? Different bra sizes for different tops? That had literally never occurred to me. I thought once you found your size, that was it. Done. No more bra shopping necessary except for replacements.
Turns out this woman, Rachel, is a professional stylist and she completely schooled me on what she called “situational sizing” over emergency coffee afterward. Basically, the idea that your 34B or whatever isn’t some universal constant but actually changes depending on what you’re wearing over it.
“Think about it,” she said, “a structured button-down puts totally different pressure on your chest than a flowy tank. Why would the exact same bra work for both?” And when she put it like that, it seemed so obvious I couldn’t believe I’d never thought of it.
This sent me down a complete rabbit hole. I started reaching out to other stylists and even professional bra fitters, asking if Rachel was just making this up or if I’d been doing everything wrong my entire adult life. Spoiler alert: I’d been doing everything wrong.
Every single expert I talked to said the same thing – most women are wearing the wrong bra size for like 60% of their wardrobe, and it’s causing all these fit issues we blame on our bodies or bad clothing design. Maria, this stylist who works with celebrities, told me “the number one mistake I see is women wearing the same bra size with every type of top, especially anything structured or cut on the bias.”
The worst offender? Button-up shirts. You know how they always gap or pull weird no matter what size you buy? Apparently almost everyone needs to go up a cup size and down a band size specifically for button-ups because the structured fabric compresses everything differently.
This explained SO MUCH about my workwear struggles. I’d been buying bigger and bigger button-ups to fit my chest, ending up with shirts that looked like tents everywhere else. Or I’d buy my normal size and spend all day checking for gaps between buttons. It was driving me insane.
I decided I needed to actually test this theory instead of just complaining about it, so I booked a professional fitting. Not just to find my “real” size but to figure out my range of sizes for different types of clothes. The whole thing was honestly pretty humbling.
My go-to 34B that I’d been wearing for years? Only correct for loose, unstructured tops. For button-ups I needed a 32C. For anything backless, completely different adhesive options. For t-shirts and other knits, a 34A with a specific molded cup shape to avoid showing every detail underneath.
I know this sounds excessive, but hear me out. I took five pieces from my closet that had always given me problems – that silk cami from the sale, a white button-up that constantly gaped, a t-shirt that made me look weird, a wrap dress that never stayed in place, and this boat neck top that never sat right – and tried them with the “correct” bra sizes.
The difference was honestly infuriating because it meant I’d spent years blaming my body for fit issues that were completely fixable. The cami draped perfectly. The button-up closed smoothly with zero gaps. The t-shirt actually looked flattering. Everything just… worked.
And it wasn’t just about looking better in photos, though that was definitely a bonus for content creation. The comfort level was completely different. No more constant adjusting, no more being hyper-aware of my clothes all day, no more changing outfits three times before leaving the house because nothing looked right.
I know what you’re thinking – this sounds expensive and complicated. And yeah, buying multiple bras in different sizes isn’t cheap. But when I calculated how much money I’d wasted on tops that never worked, clothes I bought and barely wore because they never looked right, it actually made financial sense.
The stylists I talked to suggested starting small if you’re overwhelmed by this concept. Figure out which type of clothing gives you the most consistent problems – for me it was definitely button-ups and structured pieces – and focus on getting the right bra size for those first. You don’t need to overhaul your entire underwear drawer immediately.
Also, think about what you actually wear most often. Like, I live in oversized t-shirts and cropped cardigans for casual content, and button-ups for more professional stuff. So I focused on getting those categories right before worrying about special occasion pieces.
The whole experience completely changed how I think about getting dressed. I used to treat my measurements like these fixed, unchangeable facts about my body, but they’re actually just starting points that shift depending on what you’re wearing. Our bodies aren’t experienced the same way in different fabrics and cuts, which isn’t a failure of our bodies – it’s just how three-dimensional forms work with clothing construction.
I approach outfit planning totally differently now. Instead of just grabbing whatever bra is clean and throwing on a top, I actually consider how they work together. It requires more thought initially, but the result is clothes that actually work with my body instead of fighting against it.
The best part? My content improved dramatically once I figured this out. When your clothes actually fit properly, you’re more confident in photos and videos. You’re not constantly adjusting or worrying about gaps and pulls. Everything just looks more polished and intentional.
That silk cami that started this whole revelation? It’s now one of my most-worn pieces for content. It photographs beautifully, transitions perfectly from day to night shoots, and does exactly what I originally wanted it to do. The only difference is what I’m wearing underneath it – and the confidence that comes from finally understanding that looking good in your clothes isn’t about having the “right” body, it’s about having the right support for what you’re trying to wear.
Honestly, I wish someone had told me this years ago. It would have saved me so much frustration and probably a lot of money on clothes that never quite worked. But I guess that’s what happens when you assume you know everything about something as basic as getting dressed – sometimes you discover you’ve been missing a pretty fundamental piece of the puzzle the whole time.
